The Late Demand

Let’s get into this so we can get out as soon as possible.

This episode has been conjured up to try to exonerate the HBIC (Head Bitch in Charge, emphasis on the ‘bitch’). I don’t know what frigging demon they were trying to summon, but someone definitely fucked up.

The episode begins by telling us all of the despicably slimy things that “Egocentric” Elizabeth did to get into Anthony Woodville’s underwear…I mean will. All that tells us is that she would do anything to stay rich and stay in power.

Then we bring on SOB (Some Other Bitch, less emphasis on the ‘bitch’) to explain what her ginormous nose managed to sniff out the night of the murder. She comes barging through the door, drunk off her tits, and apparently proceeds to do a reading in from of the sap she’d already fucked up with before passing out from a mixture of hysteria and too many bottles of WKD.

No matter what this podcast has tried to do by making Elizabeth seem sympathetic with her v v sad story about her parents and her little fairy cards, know that the real her came through at that moment she found out she might up eligible for a mistrial; the voice dripping with venom, violence and unrestrained vulvic-powered emotion towards that District Judge. I really hope that part also gets put forward at her hearings because then she’ll be FUCKED.

Then, to quote this podcast: if it wasn't Elizabeth who killed Anthony Woodville (it was), then who did? (See aforementioned hBic).

Well, according to “Abysmal” Anne herself, Richie was also heading to his house that night. How convenient. I know for a fact that she lied in her diaries all the time. She wrote something about some “advances” I made on her that got me in real fucking trouble with She Who Will Not Be Named, but they never happened, so I doubt that any of this did either.

The other piece of evidence “provided” by this podcast is the supposed escape route that “Richie” used after murdering Anthony. As if they’re trying to make out that Richie had anything resembling a unique look. That bint in the shop at 3 am could have been anyone.

Well fucking done you can crawl through a fence and walk down to the end of an alleyway. Doesn’t prove a fucking thing? Where’s your physical evidence? Have you heard of tampering with a crime scene?

Maybe I should look into becoming a defence barrister when I get let out. They keep setting up these poorly researched episodes and I keep knocking ‘em down.

I’ve got a mate of mine checking to see if they’re actually going to post these recaps. This is a game of chicken that I’m going to win.

Richie sucks. She didn’t do it. Elizabeth did. You’re all so fucking blind.